Adoption coach

Finding the right balance

Essence

Trust

Connect

What can I do for you as an adoption coach?

All those involved in an adoption process face a variety of questions and uncertainties. The adoptee has questions such as, who am I if I don't know where I come from? Adoption parents have questions such as, how do I guide my (adolescent) adopted child safely, if I don't understand how to place the behaviour? And the remote parent, has questions like, my child wants to get back in touch with me. What to do now? As an adoption coach I focus on all these elements in the adoption triangle.  

Why I started as an adoption coach

I stayed in a foster home until I was adopted as a three-year-old child. From that moment until today, I investigate everything I come across in my trial. This has led to a lot of insights and knowledge about how I can better deal with myself and the world around me. In my work as an adoption coach, I want to offer others in the same situation the support I missed in my process.  

Want to know more about my personal story?

Read my article 'How I view my adoption background' here.  

For whom is adoption coaching?

Adoption coaching is valuable for all parties involved in the adoption process.

  • Adoption coaching is for an adoptee who is in need of inspiration, support, or someone who 'walks, listens, and watches' in their process. Someone who can help to find direction, and offers translation during confusing moments.
  • Adoption coaching is for remote parents who are looking for someone who listens to what they essentially want for their child. Through adoption coaching, everything that has happened can be processed.
  • Adoption coaching is for adoptive parents who are looking for support at times when the relationship with their child is in danger of being disrupted. In particular, these are moments such as adolescence or when the conversation about the child's origin takes place. But this can also be when the parents and their child together want to visualize their story for the purpose of identity formation.  

What are we going to do?

Each coaching program starts with an introductory meeting in which we determine the essence of the process together. The desired perspective is also discussed and I share more about my approach.

The coaching per person involved in the adoption process differs slightly, but these sessions all take place in a pleasant, spacious coaching room or outside in the open air.  

Previous experiences

Wondering what others thought of my services as an Adoption Coach? Some of them have shared their experience with me. You can read these below.

Logo Burovince

An integrated family system has very specific dynamics and resulting challenges compared to a traditional family system. At the intersection of 'nature and nurture', both the adoptee and the adoptive family will constantly need to find a place on the path to the shared and desired perspective.


Apart from the child's regular developmental tasks and the parent's upbringing tasks, the dynamics of the composite family also play a role. For the biological family members, there are recognitions about behaviors and characteristics. For the integrated family member, these characteristics are 'disguised' or absent. The behaviour/characteristics cannot be placed. This can make it extra difficult to indicate if parents are applying the right approach. 

However, the desire to find a course together that works for everyone is big and important. In the wish to form a joint family (system) with each other as soon as possible.

Sometimes a coach who looks and listens without judgment and translates from this can be helpful. Vince is such a coach.

- Paul and Judith

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Are you looking for an adoption coach? Get in touch with me.

Probably you still have a lot of questions for me. That's why I'd love to hear from you, so we can work on your questions together soon. Please send an email to info@burovince.nl and I will get back to you as soon as possible.