Living in here and now

Living in my world. When I find myself in conversation with someone in which the complexity of our current world is discussed, I frequently hear myself sharing my view of life:

"I do my best to live in a world I want to live in by living in a way how I would want to live in my world."

By living this way, I may inspire others to also shape their lives in a way that suits them. My belief is that by doing so, we can ultimately create a more beautiful world together. Comments I regularly hear are: "That seems very difficult, I wouldn't be able to do that or that sounds good but, ..." I also get questions like, "And that always works? Or isn't that a bit utopian?" And sometimes
I am asked, "Seriously?!"

To start with the latter: yes, seriously! As my outlook on life emerged, I did have thoughts like, "Aren't I a little too old to be so naive?" But after the insights I received in the course, 'Always Happy' - a course of €80,= of 6 evenings, provided by Philo and Jan in Noordwijk- I gradually experienced that it is possible to live my vision of life.

This morning in conversation with my sweetheart, the subject also came up. She is always interested in how such topics arise with me. Her reaction to my view of life is that a privileged position can contribute to being able to live such a life. That one should be able to achieve a degree of social engineering. This statement invited me to research the influences from my past
that led to my outlook on life. Wandering the world, where I was allowed to look over the shoulder of many people at how they view the world around them. And hearing how they, apart from my perception, experienced the colors, smells, and experiences and were willing to share about that with me.

It is precisely this great diversity that I have been allowed to listen to and then marvel at that has been allowed to fill my palette of colors with countless nuances and my found judgmentlessness.

Traveling back in my mind, I reflected on the encounters I had with persons in million-dollar cities living in a seemingly hopeless loneliness of survival. But I could also see that they were always looking forward to a chance encounter with which - even if it was for a moment - color, cheerfulness, a listening ear, willingness to see the other, passed by.
In the (mountain) villages far away from any contact from the rest of the world, where only the here and now is present. Where the interconnectedness of the community and the arrival of a new face was reason to share.

And back into the world I am surrounded by, where shared experiences about feeling inadequate seem to prevail in worlds of total abundance. Where literally anything is possible that you can think of and you are invited to experience all kinds of things including things you had not suspected existed.

All this and much more came to pass this morning in conversation with my love and myself. Now looking back at the genesis of what I am writing here, I come back to Philo and Jan's course. The essence of the course was how to live in the here and now. Also, an important insight was to have no judgment towards myself about what doesn't work out. Instead to live fully to what I do want. And that is what I try to do every day now. Living in a way, the way I want to live in my world. Who knows, maybe then the world will become just a little bit more beautiful for more people. My world does.

Vincent Aelbers

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